


Semi & The Psychic

by theglitterati



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Detectives, Bank Robbery, Case Fic, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Humor, M/M, Minor Violence, it's a buddy-cop comedy y'all, most of the major characters make guest appearances
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:02:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27718582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theglitterati/pseuds/theglitterati
Summary: Semi Eita is a brilliant but disgraced detective with the Sendai Police. When he is paired up with Tendou Satori, a detective who claims to have psychic powers, to investigate a series of bank robberies, he assumes Tendou will be the last nail in his career's coffin. He doesn't expect to find a friend in Tendou, or for this case to become the most important one either of them has ever worked.
Relationships: Semi Eita & Tendou Satori, Semi Eita/Tendou Satori
Comments: 15
Kudos: 70





	1. Semi Vs. Everyone

Detective Semi Eita was having a shitty day.

Exhibit A: he was woken up two hours earlier than normal when his cat jumped onto his chest and loudly demanded food. The Sendai Police Force did not negotiate with terrorists, but the cat didn’t know that, and he didn’t stop screaming until he was given his ransom. 

Exhibit B: Since Semi couldn’t get back to sleep, he went to work early, a feeble attempt to show the higher-ups he was still the best detective in the precinct despite the recent… incident. Officer Goshiki, a kiss-ass new kid and the only other person there that early, made him coffee and promptly spilled it all over his shirt. When Sergeant Oohira arrived, Semi was wrapped in his duster coat to cover the stain, looking like a petulant vampire in the corner.

Exhibit C, and the worst of all: his new desk. Not only did it have a crap location — the aforementioned corner — but it also wobbled. Semi couldn’t lean on it or touch his keyboard without it tipping. After getting down on his knees, he realized one of the rubber feet from the bottoms of the legs was missing. He wondered if it was stolen; if so, Semi was on the case.

Which meant it would probably end in disaster.

He straightened up and glanced forlornly at his own desk, right in front of Oohira’s. Most of the precinct had arrived: Oohira and Goshiki, the former quietly filling out a report, the latter speaking far too loudly with a civilian at the front desk; Yamagata and Soekawa, pouring over a case file; Semi’s old partner, Kawanishi, staring into space as he took a statement over the phone; and Shirabu, the rising star of the precinct, who sat at Semi’s old desk.

All of the detectives were paired up except Semi. The only other member of their precinct who worked alone was their leader, Inspector Ushijima Wakatoshi, conspicuously absent this morning.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Shirabu’s voice was low, but cutting, as sharp as his dumb haircut.

Semi hadn’t realized he was staring. Kawanishi had once told him he had a pissed-off resting face (like Kawanishi was one to talk); he must have been aiming it at Shirabu.

 _Give me my fucking desk back,_ he wanted to say. _Give me my life back._

“I was thinking of ways to sabotage you,” he said, making his bitch-face active instead of passive.

Shirabu glared. “I’ll let Ushijima-san know you said that.”

Of course he would. “Keep it to yourself,” Semi hissed at him. Shirabu’s mouth turned up slightly at the corner. Semi gave his wobbly desk a kick.

As if responding to the impact, his phone rang. The caller ID said _Boss_. “Hello, Ushijima-san.”

“Good morning, Semi.” Ushijima’s deep voice boomed through the phone. “I hope this is not a bad time.”

A bad time? Semi had exactly zero cases right now. Ushijima knew that and was being polite. “No, I’m free.”

“Good. There has been a robbery at Aoba Johsai Bank in Asahigaoka. It’s the third in a string of similar robberies.”

“A robbery?” Semi had been a homicide detective for the last three years. Bank robberies were beneath him, or they used to be. He gritted his teeth. “Sure, I can check it out.”

“Excellent. I’m at headquarters right now, but I will meet you there in twenty minutes.”

“You don’t have to come,” Semi blurted. Did Ushijima think he needed a babysitter? He knew he’d fucked up, but—

“I am bringing someone with me who I would like you to meet. He will be assisting us with the case.”

Semi was perplexed, but Ushijima offered no further explanation. Semi could never tell if Ushijima was withholding information on purpose or just being obtuse. “Okay. See you there.” 

“Aw, did someone’s lunch money get stolen?” Shirabu sneered. “Do they need the best detective in Sendai on the case?”

“I don’t know,” Semi said. “But I’ll make sure to tell Ushijima you said that, since I’m going to meet him.”

The look on Shirabu’s face was the best thing that had happened all day.

The bank was surrounded by patrol cars when Semi arrived, uniformed officers milling around outside. He spotted Ushijima’s car, a sleek, black sports model, parked out front as well. He’d said twenty minutes and Semi had arrived in fifteen, but he’d still beaten him there. Great. Now Semi would look late. He pulled his elderly Toyota around back and parked.

Inside, more officers interviewed witnesses and searched for evidence. Semi found Ushijima in the middle of the room, surveying the scene with his usual grim expression.

“Hey,” Semi said.

Ushijima acknowledged him with a nod. “Thank you for coming.”

“Sure.” As if he’d had a choice. “What happened?”

“Two men entered through the front door at eleven-thirty a.m.” The clock on the wall now read twelve-fifteen. “They told the customers to get on the floor and demanded two million yen.”

“Only two million?”

“They did not wait for the safe to be opened. My guess is they wanted to get in and out quickly.”

“And no one was hurt?”

“No. Once they had the money, they left peacefully.” He frowned. “Both of the men were armed.”

“With knives?”

“Guns.”

Semi let out a startled laugh. “What is this, America?” Semi couldn’t remember ever having seen a robbery involving firearms in Sendai, let alone in the middle of the day.

“It is rather alarming,” Ushijima agreed. “It has drawn the attention of Superintendent Washijo. He asked me to put someone reliable on the case, along with the man I brought with me at his orders.”

Semi was confused, not by Ushijima’s words, but by the sheepishness on his face. “Who is he?”

“He’s a detective, but he works directly for headquarters, going wherever he is needed.” Ushijima glanced over his shoulder. “Tendou, could you come here for a moment?”

The only person nearby was a guy in his thirties; Semi had made him for a bank customer when he came in. He wore a colourful windbreaker and jeans and slurped on an iced drink that was about ninety percent whipped cream.

“Semi Eita,” Ushijima said, “this is—”

“Tendou Satori! Nice to meet you, Semi-Semi. Here, we stopped for coffee on the way. Waka says you take yours black. I like your hair, by the way. And your jacket. Kinda makes you look like Agent Mulder! Or maybe you’re Scully. You seem like the skeptical type, but of the two of us, _I’m_ the redhead!”

Semi stared at him. “What the fuck—”

“Tendou was a classmate of mine in training,” Ushijima said, his tone carefully even. “He has some… special skills that Superintendent Washijo feels will be useful on this case.”

Special skills… “Have I heard of you before?” Semi asked. He’d definitely never met Tendou — he would remember that face, and that hair — but the name rang a bell.

“Aha! I told you he’d know who I was, Waka! My gift is known far and wide.”

The word _gift_ hit Semi like a bullet. 

Tendou Satori, Sendai’s own psychic detective. He’d heard rumours about him, his uncanny ability to suss out the details behind crimes, all attributed to clairvoyant powers. Semi had expected him to be a hack, not someone who impressed the Superintendent and called Ushijima-san _Waka._

“No,” Semi said. “No, no, no.”

“See, I knew you’d be a skeptic,” Tendou said.

Semi ignored him. “Ushijima-san, may I speak to you alone?”

“I don’t think that’s necessary—”

“Nah, go for it.” How Tendou got away with cutting Ushijima off in the middle of a sentence was beyond Semi. “I’ll be over here, reading the waves.”

Semi watched him walk away. “I don’t think I can do this.”

“Work with Tendou?”

“Yes. I mean, no. I mean— I don’t usually work robberies. I’m a homicide detective.”

“Unfortunately, with guns involved, this case could escalate to homicide if we aren’t careful. That’s why I want my best man on this.”

“Call Shirabu and ask him, then.” The words were out of Semi’s mouth before he could think about them.

“I asked you,” Ushijima said slowly. “I am offering you a chance to redeem yourself. Please take it.”

Again, Semi was faced with the fact that he didn’t have a choice. It was this or sitting around the office doing paperwork like he had been for the last month, listening to Goshiki’s babbling and watching Shirabu get all the glory.

“Fine.” He looked around for Tendou. He was chatting with one of the tellers, a young guy with spiky hair. “You don’t really believe he's psychic, do you?”

“I believe he gets the job done,” Ushijima said. “He has a better case completion rate than anyone in our precinct, Shirabu included. But what I think does not matter. Superintendent Washijo has complete faith in him, so I do, too.

“Now. I have other things to attend to today. Please keep me apprised of your progress on the case.”

“Of course, sir,” Semi said. “Thank you.” 

“Good luck, Semi.”

He was going to need it.

Tendou was finishing up with the teller when Semi joined him. He gave Semi the same grin as when they were introduced, half-feral with bugged-out eyes. 

“Hey, Semi-Semi! Guess you decided to work with me after all! Oh, don’t worry about things being awkward. Most people don’t want to work with me at first. I’ll change your mind soon enough.”

Semi doubted that. “Don’t call me Semi-Semi.”

“Sure, whatever. Anyway, I asked the teller a few questions. He was the one who gave them the money. He didn’t see anything useful.”

“How could you possibly know that? You talked to him for, like, two minutes.”

Tendou tapped a finger against his temple, a knowing smile on his face. “I just know.”

Semi felt like kicking him. “Forgive me if I don’t take your word for it. I’ll talk to him myself.”

Unfortunately, Tendou — who hung over Semi’s shoulder like a gargoyle for the entire conversation — was right. The teller, Kindaichi, didn’t see anything. His description of the robbers was no more detailed than what they’d gotten from the other witnesses: one short, one tall. It could have been a description of Semi and Tendou for how vague it was. 

Kindaichi was nearly in tears after having to tell his story again. Semi gave up, telling one of his calmer coworkers to get him something to drink.

A tall man in a suit approached them. “Are you the detectives in charge?”

“We sure are,” Tendou said. “You’re the manager, right?”

Semi wondered if Tendou had divined that before seeing the name tag on the guy’s jacket. Oikawa Tooru, Branch Manager.

“Yes, I am. I’m sorry it took me so long to get here. It was my day off.”

“Lucky you,” Semi said. “Mind if we ask you a few questions about your security?”

“Sure. Iwaizumi, come join us!” A man in slacks and a button-down bulging at the sleeves wandered over. “This is Iwaizumi Hajime, our head of security. He can answer any questions you have.”

Tendou beat Semi to the punch. “How long have you both worked here?”

“I’ve been here for ten years, Iwaizumi eight. I started as a teller and worked my way up.”

“What’s the staff like? Does everyone get along?”

“For the most part, yes. The Christmas party’s always a hit.”

“Mm.” Tendou didn’t take any physical notes, though he looked like he may have been doing so mentally. “Have there been incidents of theft in the past?”

“There was a teller who was stealing when I first started,” Iwaizumi said, “but she’s been gone for ages.”

“Great, thank you. And how long have you two been dating?”

Semi choked on his coffee.

“I— uh—” Oikawa said. “How is that relevant!?”

“Wait, are you actually dating?” Semi asked.

“We’re engaged,” Oikawa said haughtily. “Not that it’s any of your business.”

“We’re the police!” Tendou said gleefully. “Everything’s our business, whether you like it or not! Don’t worry, though, I won’t put that in our report. I was just trying to prove a point.” He eyed Semi meaningfully. “That’s all my questions. I’m sure Semi-Semi has some of his own.” He strolled off, leaving Semi alone with them.

Semi did have questions — lots of them, since Tendou’s were basically useless — but he had a hard time thinking of them. After a half hour in which he learned plenty about the bank’s security and almost nothing that would help solve the case, he headed for the door. Sneaking out without Tendou noticing wasn’t an option; he was right on his heels.

“Do you believe me now?” he asked.

“That you’re psychic? Not a chance.”

“But I knew they were dating!”

“So you have good gaydar. So what?” Secretly, Semi was annoyed he hadn’t noticed their relationship. He was normally good at reading people.

Tendou poked Semi’s shoulder. “Sooo, maybe you could be less mean to me now?” Semi brushed him off.

“Look, I don’t give a shit if you’re psychic, or batshit crazy, or what. If we’re going to work together, don’t get in my way, alright?”

“Okay, okay.” Tendou raised his hands in surrender. “Whatever you say. But, uh, since Waka left, can you maybe give me a ride back to the precinct?”

Semi sighed deeply. “Fine.” He led Tendou around back to his car.

Tendou took in the dents and chipped paint. “Nice wheels, Semi-Semi.”

“Shut the fuck up.”


	2. Idiots

“I am sorry about this,” Ushijima said. “I know it's not an ideal situation.” 

Tendou grinned at Semi from across the desk.

The precinct was already too small for its staff, and adding Tendou didn’t help. Since they were working the case together, Ushijima thought the best possible solution to their lack of extra desks was to have Tendou and Semi share. Semi did not agree.

“Don’t look so grim, Semi-Semi. At least your side has leg room.” Tendou sat pretzel-style in his chair. 

“Is this going to be a problem?” Ushijima asked Semi.

“It’s fine.” Semi reminded himself, yet again, that he was not in a position to complain. Ushijima nodded and left them alone. 

Semi woke his computer to get to work. He only had the one case, but there was always paperwork to do, court appearances to prepare for. Tendou had been given a laptop, but he chose to play with Semi’s personal effects instead of using it.

“Is this your family?” He grabbed the single photo frame on the desk and spun it around. “Wow, your son is hairy.”

Semi snatched it back. “That’s my cat.”

“Aww! What’s its name?”

“Shiro.” Tendou frowned. “Because he’s white.”

“I get it. It’s just not very creative. So are you, like, a crazy cat man?”

“No, I’m not.” It wasn’t even Semi who’d framed the photo; Kawanishi had given it to him as a gag gift last Christmas. Semi wished he was sharing a desk with him instead. He spoke about five percent as much as Tendou.

“Oh.” Tendou seemed disappointed to learn he wasn’t a nutcase. If he wanted someone as out there as him for a partner, he was going to continue being let down. “Hey, you wear glasses!”

“Only for reading. Don’t put them on!”

Too late. “Do they look good on me?”

“No, they look terrible.”

“Mean, Semi-Semi.”

“They’re dollar-store glasses. They’d look bad on anyone. Now give them back.” Tendou leaned forward, making Semi remove them from his face. “And stop calling me Semi-Semi.”

“Hey, Semi-Semi,” a voice said. Kuroo Tetsurou from the forensics lab loomed over at them. His counterpart from cybercrimes, Kozume Kenma, trailed behind him. 

“Don’t you fucking start,” Semi said.

Kuroo held up his hands. “Whoa, angry. We come in peace. Who’s this?”

“Tendou Satori,” Semi said, before Tendou could regale them with his life story. “Just ignore him.”

“Okay.” Kuroo leaned against a filing cabinet. “Evidence in your robbery: there is none, at least nothing physical. We dusted for prints, but there were about a million, so no dice finding the right ones. No DNA or shoe prints, and they didn’t fire the guns, so there’s no residue.”

“Then why are you even here?”

“Kenma didn’t want to come alone.”

“Shut up, Kuro,” Kenma muttered.

“Do you have anything useful?” Semi asked him.

Kenma deigned to look up from his phone. “The cameras were clean. They didn’t disable them or cover them, but they didn’t let their faces get captured, either. They never even glanced at them, just went straight to the teller and back out. There’s a camera outside, too, and it caught them leaving, but no sign of their car.”

Semi sighed. “That tells us nothing.”

“Oh, Semi-Semi,” Tendou said. “Don’t be so closed-minded! 

“It tells us,” Kenma continued, a bit louder this time, “that they’re checking these places out beforehand. They know where everything is, and how to stay off-camera. They’ve done their research. They’re smart; not yakuza, but not common criminals, either.”

Kuroo beamed at Kenma like a proud parent. “Look at you, making a profile.”

“Leave me alone.”

“Anything else?” Semi asked.

Kenma had already returned to his phone, which meant no. “Bokuto’s working on figuring out what kind of guns they have, but the images weren’t sharp. He said to tell you he’d let you know.”

“Oh, I’m sure we’ll know soon enough,” Tendou said smugly. Semi clenched his fists under the desk as Kuroo and Kenma said their goodbyes.

“Will you stop that?” he said when they were gone.

“Stop what?”

“Implying that you’re going to pull the answers to this case out of your ass.”

“I don’t know any psychics who get their powers from their butts, Semi-Semi.”

“You don’t know any psychics, period, because they’re not real.” Semi glanced around, checking that no one was paying attention to them — shockingly, they were not — and lowered his voice. “Level with me here. It’s an act, right? No one else needs to know.”

Tendou shrugged. “It’s as much an act as your cynicism is.”

Semi rolled his eyes. “Fine. Tell me what I’m thinking right now.”

“It doesn’t work like that.” Tendou folded his hands and peered at Semi over them. “But you’re probably thinking unsavoury thoughts about yours truly.”

He wasn’t far off the mark. “Prove it to me some other way, then. Tell me something about myself you shouldn’t know.”

“Your name is Semi Eita—”

“Wow, really?”

Tendou made an extremely juvenile face at him. “Your name is Semi Eita. You’re thirty-two — so am I, by the way. You have a cat named Shiro. You worked homicide for three years until last month, when you were reassigned to… whatever unit this is. I doubt you’re happy about the move.”

“None of that is a secret.”

“You didn’t ask for a secret. You asked for something I shouldn’t know about you, and it doesn’t seem like you want me to know anything at all.” 

When he spoke again, his voice was quieter. “You’re not sleeping well.”

Semi’s eyes snapped up. Tendou smiled, almost shyly. “Was I right?”

“Lucky guess,” Semi grumbled.

The next robbery was a week later, at a Karasuno Bank branch downtown. Tendou met Semi at the scene.

“Are you kidding?” Semi said.

“What!? You said I had to wear shirts with buttons! This _has_ buttons.”

“It’s also fucking purple,” Semi snapped. “Did it have to be purple?”

“I look good in purple,” Tendou said, as though that was an acceptable explanation. “Do you even own coloured clothing Semi, or is everything in your closet black?”

“Shouldn’t you know that, Mob Psycho?”

Tendou gasped. “Holy fuck, was that a manga reference?” He grabbed Semi by the lapels and shook him. “Are you actually interesting!?”

“Get off me!” Semi flailed at him until he let go. “Come on, let’s just get inside.”

They were faster on the scene this time, and the crowd looked peaked. Semi scanned the room. “I hope the manager’s here this time.”

Tendou pointed. “Bet that’s him.”

You didn’t need to be psychic to see that the guy radiated authority. Semi approached him. “Excuse me. Are you the manager of this branch?”

“Yes, I am.” He inclined his head. “Sawamura Daichi.”

“Detectives Semi Eita and Tendou Satori. Could you tell us what you saw?”

“Of course.”

Sawamura’s story was the same as the others: two men entered through the front door, demanded two million yen, and left as soon as they got it. No one was hurt.

“A customer tried to run,” Sawamura said, “but the shorter guy kind of corralled her in. He wasn’t violent about it, just businesslike.” 

“Interesting,” Semi said. “What’s your security like?”

“We have guards on-site, cameras. The safe’s on a timer. Honestly, though, it’s not a huge help in situations like this. Our policy is to cooperate with robberies so as not to endanger anyone. Our guards are more useful for dealing with disgruntled customers.”

“Makes sense. Can we see the cameras?”

The monitors were in a back room, manned by two guards: a redhead who looked about sixteen and his taller, brooding friend. Sawamura introduced Semi and Tendou and left to comfort the cashier who’d dealt with the robbery. Apparently, they’d picked a timid one again, though you wouldn’t have known it from the teller’s giant stature.

“What are your names?” Tendou asked.

“Kageyama,” the broody one said. “That’s Hinata.”

“You two were back here the whole time?” They nodded. “So you saw the whole thing?”

“Well… no,” Hinata said. “About an hour ago, the cameras cut out completely. The TVs were all, like, fuzzy, you know? We were trying to fix it when Sawamura-san told us there’d been a robbery.”

“So the cameras went down, and you didn’t go out and check if anything was wrong?” Semi asked.

“It happens sometimes!” Hinata protested. “Our system’s really old.”

“It’s not like we could have done anything anyway,” Kageyama grunted.

“That’s different from last time,” Semi said to Tendou. “If they’re cutting the cameras, that’s a definite escalation. Not to mention the technical know-how it requires.”

“It would be an escalation,” Tendou said, “if it were true.”

“Huh?”

“They’re lying, duh. Oh, Semi-Semi, can’t you tell?” Semi wanted to smack the condescension off his face. “Although I’m not sure yet if it’s because they were involved, or if they’re just covering their own asses.”

“What?” Hinata sputtered. “I’m not— why would we—”

“Told you it wouldn’t work,” Kageyama said.

“Hah! See, Semi-Semi, I told you!”

Semi ignored him, though it was becoming harder and harder to do so. “What really happened?”

“Kageyama fell asleep!” Hinata screeched. Wow, this dude would _not_ hold up under torture. “He totally falls asleep every shift and expects me to pay attention one hundred percent of the time, which is impossible!”

“It’s more impossible when you play hacky sack all day and don’t even look at the cameras,” Kageyama hissed.

Semi pinched the bridge of his nose. “Just give us the tape.”

Hinata handed over a flash drive. “Please don’t tell Sawamura-san on us.”

“You two are the worst security guards ever.” To Tendou, he added, “We really should tell Sawamura. He needs to know how shitty his security is.”

“Oh, don’t be a pill,” Tendou said. “Let’s just give them a warning. You boys aren’t going to be sleeping or playing on the job anymore, are you?”

“No, sir!” Hinata said.

“No,” Kageyama said sullenly.

“Great! Then I guess we’re done here.” Tendou picked up the hacky sack. “This is mine now. Come along, Semi-Semi!” Semi followed him through the lobby and into the parking lot. 

“Do you believe me yet?”

“Nope.”

“But I knew they were lying, and you totally didn’t!”

“Don’t care. Psychics powers aren’t real.” Semi sounded defensive, even to himself.

“Do you at least appreciate having me around more now?” 

He was so eager. Semi had been nothing but a dick to him, but he hadn’t managed to wipe the smile off his face. “Marginally.”

“Hey, that’s something, right?” His smile grew. “You’ll learn to love me.”

Semi hoped that wasn’t a prediction. Tendou hadn’t been wrong yet.


	3. Tragic Backstory

The fifth robbery was at a small bank on the outskirts of the city called Wakutani Minami. The manager, Nakashima Takeru told the same story they’d heard from Oikawa and Sawamura, and their security guard, Kawatabi Shunki, had nothing but the backs of the perps’ heads on tape.

“Anything else you noticed?” Semi asked. “Anything at all?”

“I don’t know if this matters, but—”

“Everything matters!” Tendou said.

“Then stop interrupting him,” Semi hissed.

“When they came in, it was kinda crazy,” Nakashima continued. “There was this old lady by the door, and she fell trying to get away. One of the guys, the shorter one, stopped to help her up. Obviously she was terrified, since he had a gun, so he opened the front door and told her to go. Not rudely, but like he was being polite. Then he went back to helping his partner rob the place.”

“Huh,” Semi said. “That’s weirdly considerate.”

“Yeah. The other guy, not so much. He snapped at the short guy to hurry up.”

Semi wrote that down. Tendou still hadn’t taken a single note. Semi hoped there was space in his brain amongst his prophecies to remember the basic facts of the case.

“Thanks a lot,” Semi said. “We’ll be in touch.” He and Tendou shook Nakashima’s hand before leaving.

They were barely out the door when Tendou said, “Okay, tell me I don’t look as weird as that security guard.”

Semi eyed Tendou. “At least he wasn’t dressed like a C-rate DJ.” Tendou wore a floral shirt — button-down, per Semi’s rule — and bomber jacket paired with jeans and colourful sneakers. Semi had branched out that morning by choosing a grey coat instead of his usual black.

“At least I don’t have something sprouting from my head.”

“True,” Semi said, laughing. He’d caught himself doing so frequently lately, loosely correlated to when Tendou was around. He told himself it was because the case was getting interesting, but the truth was, Tendou was growing on him. Like a fungus, or a vine that would strangle him if he didn’t keep it pruned.

“You wanna get lunch?” Tendou asked. “I’m starving.”

“Yeah, sure.” If Semi didn’t know better, he’d think they were becoming friends.

They went to a cafe near the bank. The server sat them in a quiet booth near the back and took their orders: black coffee and a tuna sandwich for Semi, hot chocolate and pancakes for Tendou.

“How do you even have teeth left?” Semi asked when she was gone.

“I brush thoroughly. Maybe you’d be sweeter if you ate more sugar, Semi-Semi.”

Semi snorted. “It would take more than sugar to make me sweet.”

He expected Tendou to tease him, but he tipped his head sideways and stared at him. Semi had to avert his eyes; Tendou blinked less than regular people, and it freaked Semi out.

“I don’t think you’re a bad guy,” Tendou said. “A little broody, but not bad.”

“I’m not _broody.”_

“I see. Oh, thanks!” Their server had brought their meals. Tendou went to work cutting up his pancakes. “So you’d be fine with telling me why you’re no longer working homicide?”

“Don’t you already know?”

“Not how it works.” Tendou was always saying that; Semi was starting to think his bullshit powers only worked when it was convenient for him.

“You could have looked it up, or asked someone. I’m sure Shirabu would be more than happy to tell you.”

Tendou’s face softened. “I wanted to hear it from you. ‘Course, if you don’t want to tell me, then I _will_ ask Shirabu.” He stabbed his pancakes.

“Fine,” Semi said. “A few months ago, there were these murders—”

“All my favourite stories start like that.”

“Shut up or I’m not telling you.”

“Sorry.”

“They were pretty brutal,” Semi continued. “The guy killed with a knife and did a horrible job of it, hacking the victims to bits. He got to four people before we— before I got any leads.” He and Kawanishi had worked the case together, but Semi was the one in charge.

“I tracked it back to the local yakuza. They normally keep to themselves, don’t fuck with people who aren’t ‘in the game,’ or whatever. It turned out there was a new gambling den in town, and this guy was knocking off people who hadn’t paid their debts. We handed the den over to organized crime, but since we’d been working the murders, we stayed on the case.” He wished they hadn’t.

“I found the killer, a guy named Satou Kiyoshi. A witness saw him leave the scene of the last murder. I brought the information to Ushijima and said I was ready to make an arrest.” Semi paused to take a bite of his sandwich. It was bland, with too much mayonnaise.

“I’m guessing you didn’t arrest him?”

“Wow, maybe you really are psychic,” Semi said, chewing. “No, we didn’t. Ushijima was on board, but HQ wasn’t. They decided we should follow him, let him lead us back to whatever hole he crawled out of. We could flip him, or use him for info, and take down part of the organization.”

“While continuing to let him kill people?”

“Nobody said that, but yeah. That part didn’t sit right with me. I argued with the Superintendent, got shut down. Ushijima said I had to do what I was told, but I couldn’t let a murderer walk free. I felt like, if he killed someone else, it was on me.

“Kawanishi and I staked out his apartment one night. When Taichi went to get drinks, I went inside. I kicked the door in and said I was there to arrest him.”

Tendou poked Semi’s hand; he realized it was clenched into a fist on the table.

“What happened?” Tendou said softly. “Did he run?”

“He shot himself. Said he was never going to let us catch him. He blew his brains out right in front of me.”

Tendou’s gaze was too concerned for Semi to stand. He stared down at his sandwich, which no longer looked appetizing.

“Obviously, the killing stopped, but we didn’t get any of the information we wanted from him. Superintendent Washijo screamed at me when he found out. He wanted to fire me, but Ushijima talked him into letting me stay as long as I was taken off homicide. I guess I got lucky.” Semi didn’t feel lucky.

“So that’s it,” he finished lamely. Tendou was quiet. “Anything you want to say?”

“LIke what?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Most people tell me I acted like a reckless idiot, or that I didn’t think things through. Stuff like that.”

Tendou tapped a long finger to his lips. “Why did you do it? Go after him alone, I mean.”

“Because I wanted the killing to stop, obviously. I didn’t think he was going to give us any useful information, and considering how things ended, he probably wouldn’t have.”

Tendou tipped his head again. “Was that the only reason?”

Once again, Semi found himself hating how perceptive Tendou was.

“No. I wanted to do it my way. I wanted to prove that I was right, that I knew how to handle things better than anyone else.” Semi scoffed. “Clearly, I didn’t, and now everyone thinks I’m a joke.”

“I don’t.” Semi’s eyes snapped up. “I don’t think you’re a joke. You did what you thought was right. That’s the best anyone can do.”

Semi almost lost it on him. Tendou, the psychic cop, telling him he took him seriously? He was maybe the last person in the world Semi wanted reassurance from. But he was making an effort, which was more than Semi could say about the rest of the precinct, his old partner included. Nothing on Tendou’s face suggested pity or mockery, just the honest truth that he thought Semi deserved a second chance.

“Thank you,” Semi blurted. It came out sharper than intended.

Tendou smiled, taking Semi’s awkwardness in stride. Semi wondered if Tendou ever doubted himself; if he did, he never let it show.

Tendou pointed to his half-eaten pancakes. “You wanna try these?”

“I thought you said you were starving.”

“Eh. I’m full now. Come on, they’re really good.”

Semi definitely wasn’t finishing his sandwich. “Yeah, okay.” Tendou pushed the plate towards him and handed him a fork.


	4. Law & Order & Tongue Rings

“Good work today, Semi-san,” Akaashi said as they left the courtroom. Akaashi Keiji was one of the best prosecutors in Sendai and Semi had worked with him on several cases in the past. Semi liked him; he was efficient and professional, unlike some people Semi knew.

“Thanks. You think you’ll win?”

“Probably. The judge seems to be on our side so far.” Akaashi shuffled a few papers in his bag. “How are you doing? I heard you’re working a bank robbery case.” Another thing Semi liked about Akaashi: he was tactful enough not to have mentioned Semi’s demotion once today.

“Yeah. It’s been more interesting than I expected. They’re smarter than your usual criminals.” There had been another robbery yesterday, at a second Karasuno branch, which brought the toll up to six. Getting away with that many was impressive.

“I look forward to trying it, if it comes my way.” Akaashi frowned. “I also heard you’re working with Tendou Satori.”

“You know him?”

“I’ve had a few of his cases. He’s awful on the stand. One whiff of his psychic act and his credibility goes out the window.”

“Has he made you lose cases?”

“No, I won them all.” Akaashi sniffled. “It’s just annoying.”

“Honestly, I thought working with him was going to be a lot worse than it is.” Semi felt the need to defend Tendou, something he never would have expected a few weeks ago. “I mean, he’s nuts, but he’s also pretty damn good at his job. He’s caught things I never would have.”

“Wow, that’s— oh, god. Speaking of nuts.”

“Hey hey, Akaashi, don’t say that! You love when I come to visit!” Bokuto Koutarou, ballistics expert, joined them, leaning against the doorframe and into Akaashi’s personal space. Bokuto looked nothing like a forensic tech should; he had a body like a linebacker and wild eyes that suggested he was the last person who should ever be given a gun.

“Did you forget your court date again?” Akaashi said. “You’re not supposed to be here until tomorrow.”

Bokuto pouted. “No! I wrote it down on the calendar you got me! I was actually looking for Semi. I have news for him.”

“About the gun?” They’d gotten a break yesterday: one of the hostages had called the police during the robbery. The thieves were in a hurry when they left, and in the rush, one of the guys — the short one — left his gun behind.

“Yep!” Bokuto pulled a ziploc bag containing a small pistol out of his bag and thrust it at Semi. “Here you go!”

Akaashi jumped back. “Jesus, Bokuto-san. Is that loaded?”

Bokuto grinned. “That’s the thing: it doesn’t matter! Take a look,” he urged Semi. “You can take it out of the bag. We dusted for prints, but didn’t find anything.”

Semi did not take it out of the bag, turning it over in his hands instead. He saw why Bokuto was so excited. “You’ve got to be kidding.”

“Nope, it’s totally fake! It’s probably from an upscale toy store. It doesn’t even shoot BBs.”

“I can’t believe this,” Semi murmured. Almost ten million yen, stolen with a toy gun.

“You got this yesterday?” Akaashi asked Bokuto.

“Yep.”

“And it took you an entire day to figure out it was a toy?”

“No!” Bokuto whined. “What took so long was comparing this one to the footage of the other guy’s gun to make sure they’re both fake. They are, by the way,” he added to Semi. Akaashi actually seemed impressed.

“That’s a relief,” Semi said. At least no one would get hurt while they figured out the case.

His phone went off in his pocket. It was a text from Tendou, the ID showing a picture of him making a peace sign over one eye. Disturbingly, Semi had never seen the picture before, nor had he changed Tendou’s name in his phone to Favourite Person Ever. The text read: _SEMI-SEMI WE HAVE A SUSPECT COME 2 PRECINCT NOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!!_

Semi sighed heavily. “I have to go.”

Semi found Tendou outside one of the interrogation rooms, playing with the hacky sack he’d stolen from Hinata Shouyou. “Hey Semi-Semi, catch!”

The ball fell to the floor at Semi’s feet. “Is that him?”

“Yeah, that’s him.” Tendou picked up the ball; Semi went to the window to see their suspect. “Name’s Terushima Yuuji. That little blonde dude from tech caught him on camera in the alley right after the robbery. Patrol picked him up this morning.” Tendou tossed the hacky sack over Semi’s head and caught it easily. “He’s not our guy, though.”

“Did you question him without me?”

Tendou put a hand over his heart. “Semi-Semi, I would never. I just know it’s not him.”

“We still have to question him, dummy.”

“Fine, fine.” Tendou passed over his file from the table. “I guess I’ll let you take the lead on this one.”

Semi rolled his eyes. “Thanks. Come on, let’s get this over with.”

They went inside. Semi sat down across from Terushima and Tendou stood in the corner, still tossing the hacky sack. Semi was going to rip it to shreds the second this was over. “Sorry to have kept you waiting.”

Terushima leaned forward. “Is this about that bank robbery?” Semi caught a glimpse of a tongue piercing when he spoke. “‘Cause I had nothing to do with that.”

“I didn’t say you did.” Semi skimmed his file. Parking tickets and a public indecency charge, but no arrests. “We have you on camera behind the bank. See anything interesting?”

Terushima glanced back and forth between Semi and Tendou. “No, nothing.”

“Why were you in the alley in the first place?”

“I had to take a leak.”

“Didn’t see that on camera. You’re lucky we didn’t, or you’d be getting another public indecency ticket.”

“I, uh, I went behind the dumpster,” Terushima said.

“Nope!” It was Tendou who spoke. He put the hacky sack away and pulled out a chair, flipping it around and sitting on it backwards. “Nope, nope, nope.”

So much for Semi taking the lead. “What do you mean?” Terushima asked.

“Exactly what I said. It’s a nice story — or I guess it’s not, really, public urination is never nice — but it’s a lie, right?”

“What? No—”

“We all know you were back there selling drugs, so cut the shit and tell us what happened, mmkay?”

Semi did not, in fact, know this, nor had he ever seen Tendou look so terrifying. There was nothing in Terushima’s file about drugs. If this was one of Tendou’s guesses, he was taking a big risk.

“That’s— that’s not—” Terushima sputtered. “Look, it was just weed, okay? Nothing major. Do you guys really care about that when there’s, like, someone out there stealing millions of yen?!”

Tendou leaned back, a satisfied smile on his face. “Nah, not really.”

“Excuse me,” Semi said, “I care a little bit—”

Tendou waved him off. “Relax, okay?” he said to Terushima. Scary-Tendou had completely disappeared, like he’d never been there at all. “Now it’s all out in the open, just tell us what you saw.”

Terushima was wary. “So I’m not being charged with anything?”

Tendou rested his chin on his hands, grinning. “Not if you’re useful.”

“I wanna be, okay?” That was the first time Semi had ever heard a criminal say they wanted to help the cops. Damn, Tendou was good. “But I seriously didn’t see anything. I was back there maybe twenty minutes and nothing happened. My buyer didn’t show, and when I came out, there were cops everywhere, so I bounced.”

“So you didn’t even make a sale?”

“No.”

Tendou tipped his head. “Then why did you feel like you had to get away from the cops?”

“I dunno,” Terushima said. “It spooked me, I guess. That’s, uh, one of my usual meeting places — though it won’t be, after this, so don’t bother looking for me — but there’s never cops around there.”

“Never?”

Terushima shrugged. “It’s kind of a shitty neighbourhood, you know? And the local precinct is pretty far away.”

“Hmm.” Tendou tapped his fingers on the table, thinking. “Gimme a sec, okay? I’ll be right back.” He jumped up and left the room.

 _Sure, I’ll just wait here,_ Semi thought. _Thanks for telling me where you’re going. Oh, and thanks for the heads-up about the drugs. I love how you always make this feel like an equal partnership, Tendou._

“Yo,” Terushima said. “Is that guy even a real cop?”

“Shut up,” Semi said.

Tendou returned with a giant map of Sendai and a marker. He sat down and started drawing circles over their crime scenes.

“There,” he said when he was done. He slid the map over to Terushima. “How likely would it be to run into cops in these areas?”

Terushima studied the map so thoroughly Semi wondered if they should put him on the payroll. “Dunno about these two” — he pointed to Aoba Johsai and the first Karasuno location — “I don’t hang out around there. But this one” — he pointed to Tokonami Bank, the site of the first robbery — “I, uh, heard about some deals going on around there. And this one” — the other Karasuno branch — “that neighbourhood’s got a lot of prostitution. Not that I’d know anything about that.”

“Of course not,” Semi said.

Tendou snatched the map back and added more icons, smiley faces this time — local precincts, Semi realized. How Tendou had them all memorized, he had no idea. When he was done, he connected each crime scene and its local precinct with a squiggly line.

“Aha! Semi-Semi, do you see this?”

“Uh.” What Semi saw was the red string-covered bulletin board of a stalker, or maybe a connect-the-dots puzzle completed by a raccoon. “No?”

“They’re hitting the banks farthest from their corresponding precincts! Look, they’ve done their research — some of these are close to police stations in other neighbourhoods, but not the ones that would respond to a call at that bank, meaning when a call comes in, they always have time to get away. They’re analyzing the city to their advantage!”

As Tendou explained it, the pattern revealed itself to Semi. “Holy shit, you’re right. These are all at least a kilometre away from the precinct.” His brain was running, tripping over itself trying to absorb the information. “If we follow their pattern, we might be able to figure out where they’ll hit next. This is incredible, Tendou!”

“I know, right!?” Tendou beamed. “And I knew about the drug thing, too! Admit it, Semi-Semi, I’m a great partner!”

Semi snorted, but he felt himself being caught up in Tendou’s buoyant mood. They have a real lead, and Tendou was to thank. “You’re tolerable,” Semi managed.

Tendou leaned closer. “I think you find me more than tolerable. I think you find me downright satisfactory.”

“Adequate, at best.”

Tendou laughed. “Aww, don’t be like that.”

“Excuse me,” Terushima said. “Can I go now?!”

“Huh? Oh, sure,” Tendou said. “Right, Semi-Semi?”

“I guess. Though if we catch you selling again, don’t expect any favours.”

“Thanks for all your help!” Tendou added.

Terushima headed for the door. “You guys are fucking weird.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Tendou said. “Say no to drugs, or whatever!” To Semi, he added, “We’ve got work to do.”


	5. Shot Through The Heart (not really)

They narrowed the location of the next robbery down to two potential locations: Ohgi Minami, in a seedy area downtown, or Dateko, a big bank in their own precinct’s jurisdiction. 

“I think it’s gonna be Dateko,” Tendou said. They had stayed late, pouring over the map. Semi was exhausted, and Tendou, unflagging ball of energy, had bags under his eyes. “Do you trust me?”

“Yeah,” Semi said. Tendou had gotten them this far. “Yeah, I trust you.”

They sent a few patrol officers to stake out Ohgi Minami while they covered Dateko. The first week of their watch yielded nothing, though considering they started only two days after the previous robbery, that didn’t mean much. They passed the time talking in Semi’s car, Tendou asking question after question about Semi but sharing little about himself.

“What’s the point of asking me all this?” Semi said.

“I’m getting to know you. Duh.”

Semi rolled his eyes, but he kept answering.

On Friday, their sixth day of the stakeout, Semi returned from a coffee run and slid into the driver’s seat. “Anything?”

“Nah.” A red mark shone on Tendou’s cheek where it had been squished against the window. “Just more old people. Everyone in this city is so _old,_ Semi-Semi.”

“Including us, by some standards.” He held out Tendou’s drink. “Here.”

Tendou took a sip and immediately spat it out. He had finally dressed appropriately, in a white button-down and slacks — if they actually got to confront their suspects, Semi was not doing it with a Batman villain-look alike in tow — both of which were now covered in brown stains. “What is this!?”

“Coffee?”

“It’s horrible. Where did you even get this?”

“The conbini over there. What, was I supposed to go to a café for you, princess?”

“You could have at least put sugar in it.”

“There _is_ sugar in it.” Semi had put twice what he thought was reasonable. “You didn’t have to spit it everywhere.”

“I absolutely did.”

Semi grabbed a handful of fast-food napkins from the console and shoved them at him. “Clean yourself up.”

They were so busy scrubbing Tendou’s clothes that they almost missed their guys. “Oh, shit! Semi, look!”

Two men rounded the corner of the Dateko building, black masks covering their faces. The déjà vu Semi felt was staggering. He’d watched them on tape every day, seen them in his dreams, and here they were, right in front of him. 

Tendou fumbled around for his walkie-talkie and called for backup. The men entered the bank. Semi heard a scream. “Let’s go.”

They hustled to the entrance, guns held at their sides. Semi peeked in, but glare from the sun obscured the view.

Tendou stared at the door. “I think we should go in.”

“What!?” Semi motioned for him to step back; Tendou ignored him. “That wasn’t the plan!”

Ushijima had specifically told them to wait outside and apprehend the robbers when they left. If they stopped them before they robbed Dateko, and they couldn’t tie them to the other cases, they might walk free. More importantly, if they interrupted the robbery, someone could get hurt.

“I have a bad feeling about waiting. I don’t want them getting away.” Tendou’s eyes were a little too bright. “I’m going in.”

“Tendou, don’t—” Semi called, but he had already opened the door.

“Police! Don’t move! Everyone put your hands up!”

“God _fucking_ damnit.” Semi caught the door before it closed and followed Tendou in.

When his eyes adjusted to the light, Semi found Tendou in a stand-off with the shorter of the two guys. His partner was at the counter, a backpack half-filled with cash in his hands. A small crowd of hostages cowered in the corner.

“Put the gun down,” Tendou said calmly.

The guy shook his head. “I’m not putting it down until you both drop yours.”

“Not gonna happen.” Tendou stepped forward. Semi’s own feet felt glued to the floor. “We just wanna talk, ‘kay?”

“Back off!” 

Tendou sighed. “Look, we both know it’s a fake gun. Can you—”

“It’s not fake.”

“Yeah, it is, just like the last one you lost. So let’s all chill. You’re not gonna shoot me, and neither is he.” He gestured with his gun at the guy’s partner. “I mean, come on—”

A shot rang out, echoing off the high ceilings.

Chaos erupted. Customers screamed and ran for the front door as uniformed officers burst through it. The two robbers disappeared into the back. An old man fainted. Semi hardly noticed any of it, because all he could see was Tendou lying on the ground. He started running.

Tendou was awake when Semi reached him. “Go after them!” he said. “I’m fine, go!”

Semi dropped to his knees. “You’re not fucking fine, you got shot!”

“Well, then, I will be! Just go!”

“Shut up,” Semi hissed at him. He ripped the arm of Tendou’s jacket open, revealing blood, too much of it. “Fuck, you need an ambulance.”

“I already called one,” a voice said. It was the Dateko security guard, a tower of a man with shocking white hair.

“Thanks. Tendou— oi, Tendou, stay awake!”

“That’s a _lot_ of blood,” Tendou’s eyes unfocused, rolling back in his head. “Horrible day to wear white, huh?”

“Tendou, don’t you dare pass out!”

“Ugh,” he mumbled. “This is really gross.”

He proceeded to pass out.

Semi sat in the waiting room, staring at his hands. He’d washed them several times, but a crust of blood remained on his cuticles. He picked at it, as though cleaning it would rid him of the memory of how it got there. A drop of his own blood appeared at the edge of his nail.

“Semi-san?” A nurse hovered over him, the same one he’d dealt with at intake. “You can see him now.”

Semi jumped to his feet. “How is he?”

“He’s doing fine. The doctor got the bullet out and stitched him up. He won’t be doing cartwheels anytime soon, but he can go home tonight.”

Semi would have laughed at the image of Tendou doing cartwheels if he wasn’t so angry. It sounded like something he’d do.

“This is his room. Ring us if he needs anything. The doctor should be back to discharge him in an hour.”

Semi thanked him and went inside. Tendou was awake and sitting up in bed. He looked pale — paler than usual — but otherwise alright.

“Hey, Semi-Semi. Didja miss me?” Yeah, he was fine. “Come to kiss it better?”

“I’m too pissed at you for that,” Semi said.

“That’s fair. But don’t worry, we’ll get ‘em next time. Or maybe there won’t be a next time. If I were them, I’d lie low after shooting a cop.”

“You think that’s why I’m mad? Because they got away?”

“Well, yeah. I mean, we worked so hard to track them down, and I took a risk that didn’t pay off—”

“You could have died!” Semi yelled. “Tendou, this wasn’t just you getting a prediction wrong. If he’d aimed a few inches to the right, you’d be dead!”

“Oh.” Tendou blinked. “I’m sorry, Semi-Semi.”

“Don’t apologize.” That wasn’t what Semi wanted. He sunk into a nearby chair. “They told you that you can go home today, right?” Tendou nodded. “Good. You’re staying with me.”

“I am? Why?”

“Because I don’t want you doing something stupid like getting shot again. At least not for a little while.”

Tendou gave him a small smile. “That’s nice of you, but you don’t have to—”

The door opened. Ushijima’s face was impassive as usual, but Semi thought he caught a glimpse of relief when he saw Tendou awake. “I hope I’m not interrupting.”

“Not at all, Waka. We were just talking about how to leave the country before you kill both of us for what we did.”

“Tendou, shut up,” Semi huffed. “That’s not funny.”

“I agree with Semi,” Ushijima said gravely. “I simply came to make sure you were alright, Tendou. We can discuss how you will be disciplined on Monday. Semi, may I speak to you privately?”

Apparently Semi didn’t get the luxury of waiting until Monday. “Sure, Ushijima-san.”

“Waka, wait, don’t be mad at him,” Tendou said. “Seriously. What happened was one hundred percent my fault. Semi tried to stop me. I take full responsibility for the shitshow that went down today.”

Ushijima looked back and forth between them. Semi felt as frozen as he had when he’d followed Tendou into the bank.

“Fine,” Ushijima said. “Tendou, I expected better of you. I can’t say what the reaction from headquarters will be to your behaviour, but I imagine it won’t be positive.” He shifted uncomfortably. Ushijima was strict, but Semi knew he didn’t relish disciplining his officers. “I’m going to go now. Feel better.”

“Are we still on the case?” Semi blurted.

Ushijima paused in the doorway. “Until Monday, yes. I don’t suggest you take your time.”

“Can I hold him?”

“Your arm’s in a sling. Here.” Semi lifted Shiro and held him up to Tendou’s face. He licked Tendou’s nose once and purred.

“Semi-Semi, I _love_ him.”

“Good,” Semi said. “Maybe he can bother you for food while you’re here instead of me.” He put Shiro down and led Tendou into his apartment.

“This is a nice place.”

“It’s boring.”

Tendou shrugged. “It looks kinda like mine.”

“I thought yours would be painted orange, or you’d have a sex dungeon, or something.”

“A guy can dream.”

Semi settled Tendou on the couch and prepared a late dinner, chicken and rice soup. He served Tendou’s in a mug, since he only had one good hand. 

Tendou was surprisingly quiet during dinner, nodding off in front of the TV soon after. “We should get some sleep,” Semi said. “I’ll take the couch and get the bed made up for you.”

“You don’t have to do that. You’re already doing enough.”

“You’re not sleeping on the couch after getting shot. Besides, if you sleep in the bed, Shiro will sleep with you.”

Tendou perked up. “Okay!”

Semi changed the sheets and gave Tendou a spare pair of his sweats to change into. They were a little short, but they’d do.

“Thanks again,” Tendou said. “You didn’t have to do this.”

“Yeah, I did.” It wasn’t just a sense of duty, either; Semi had wanted to. “Goodnight, Tendou.”

He was almost to the door when he heard Tendou say, “Eita?”

The use of his given name stilled him. “Yeah?”

“I’m not psychic.”

“I know that,” Semi said slowly. Even to his own ears, he didn’t sound sure.

“I know you know.”

“Why, then?” Semi asked. “Why do you tell people you are?”

“You know, it wasn’t actually me who started it?” Semi sat on the end of the bed to listen. “It was the people I trained with. A lot of them didn’t like me, for obvious reasons — Waka was one of the few nice ones. But I was really good, so they assumed I had to be cheating. How could someone like me be better than them, right?” Tendou smiled, but it was bitter, not his usual grin. “One of them started a rumour I was psychic, and… it just kind of went from there.”

“So you really are just guessing?”

“Yep. I’ve always been good at reading people, and I’m almost always right. Though, when I’m not…” He gestured to his wounded arm. When he was wrong, he was _wrong._

“But why did you keep saying it? Why didn’t you just tell them to fuck off?”

“They would have just found something else to say. If I’m going to get called names, I might as well lean into it. If I turn it into a positive, they can’t use it against me. And it has been a positive,” he added. “Whatever people believe, what I can do makes me valuable.”

Semi frowned. “You’re valuable without that, too. You always do what you think is right. Isn’t that the best anyone can do?”

“Someone really smart must have told you that.”

“Nah, he was kind of an idiot.” Tendou laughed, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Hey, how come you’re telling me this now?”

Tendou sighed. “Because I might have finally fucked up so bad they’ll fire me. At the very least, I’ll be reassigned. I’m used to it, but… I hoped I’d get to work with you a little longer, Eita.”

Semi gritted his teeth. “You’re not going anywhere yet. We have a case to solve.”

“Right,” Tendou said. Semi got the impression he was humouring him. “I should probably get some sleep, then.”

“We’ll start working first thing in the morning.”

“Aye aye, boss. Goodnight, Semi-Semi.”

“‘Night, Tendou.”


	6. The Things We Do For Love

There was a knock at Semi’s door. He opened it and found Kenma on the other side.

“Thanks for coming. Why’s he here?” Kuroo leaned against the opposite wall.

“Kenma didn’t want to come alone—”

“Shut up, Kuro. He wanted to see the cat,” he told Semi.

Kuroo grinned. “Okay, maybe I wanted to see the cat.”

“He’s right here!” Tendou called from the couch. Shiro was curled into a ball on his lap; he hadn’t left Tendou’s side since he arrived except to beg Semi for food.

“Aww, cute!” Kuroo rushed to sit next to him and pat Shiro’s head.

“Yeah, sure, come on in,” Semi grumbled.

Kenma, still in the doorway, offered Semi a flash drive. “It’s the tape from yesterday. I went through it a bunch of times, and there’s nothing to identify them.”

“Thanks for bringing it. Hopefully we can find something useful.”

“Brought you something else, too,” Kuroo said. He pulled a small plastic bag from his pocket and waved it at Tendou. “It’s the bullet from your arm.”

Semi balked. “I don’t know that he really wants to see that!”

Tendou took the bag and examined the bullet. He pointed a finger at it. “You hurt me, motherfucker.”

“Bokuto says it’s from a .45,” Kuroo said. “Bought from a local gang.”

“Bought?”

“That’s what he said. Apparently, the way the guy held it, it was obvious he’d never shot one before. Gimme that.” Tendou was teasing Shiro with the bag; Kuroo yanked it away from them. “Akaashi will kill me if he finds out I took this out of evidence, but I thought you’d want to see it for yourself.”

“Make sure it gets put back properly,” Semi said. He hustled Kuroo to the door. Kenma, apparently, had already left.

“Can I come back and play with the cat another time?” Kuroo asked. Semi shut the door in his face.

He fiddled with the flash drive. He was itching to see the tape, but he didn’t want Tendou to get upset, watching himself get shot—

“Quit worrying and put the movie on, Semi-Semi,” Tendou said. “You got any popcorn?”

The bank had ten cameras, the robbery took eight minutes, and they watched all of the footage at least twice, spending the better part of the afternoon hunched over Semi’s laptop. It never got any easier, seeing Tendou get hit. The cameras didn’t record sound, so instead of the screaming that had followed, there was only silence as he fell to the floor again and again.

Semi replayed the footage from the camera above the front door, which had the best view, and paused it right after the gun went off. “I still don’t get why he shot you.”

“He was freaked out?” Tendou said. “I have that effect on people.”

“No, you don’t,” Semi chided. Tendou gave him a look. “Okay, fine, you do, but if he had no experience, he should have put the gun down, not shot it. He was scared, yes, but he wasn’t panicking.” He rolled the tape back. “Okay, watch. You’re talking to him, and then— wait.” He paused and rewound again, watching closely. “There— do you remember what you said?”

“I said ‘you’re not gonna shoot me, and neither is he.’”

Semi zoomed in. The tape was blurry, but played slowly, he could see Tendou’s arm move. “You pointed at the other guy. With the gun.”

“Yeah. Well, not ‘pointed,’” Tendou said defensively. “I was, you know, gesticulating. For effect.”

“And that’s when he shot you. Not when you were aiming for him, but when you _gesticulated_ the gun at his friend. He was defending him, Tendou.”

“But would he do that?” Tendou argued. “I mean, this is the same guy who helped up the old lady, right? That made me think he wasn’t as into it as his partner, but then he shoots me! So now I don’t know. I mean, why go along with the other guy’s crazy plan if it doesn’t matter to him?”

Tendou sighed dramatically, his breath making his bangs flutter. His hair was ungelled for once, falling in his eyes, and Semi couldn’t help but stare. It made Tendou look softer, younger. Semi felt an urge to touch it, to brush it back from his face. His hand was halfway there when he froze.

He understood why. He understood everything.

“Holy shit,” he said. “I know who it is.”

They arrived at the bank at eleven the next morning, with a dozen uniformed officers and Ushijima himself.

“Tendou,” Ushijima said. “Do I need to tell you not to do anything irrational?”

“Nah. I’ll let Semi-Semi take the lead this time.” Ushijima nodded; he would follow Semi as well.

The last time Semi had done this, it did not go well. Today, he wore a bulletproof vest under his jacket, just in case. He took a deep breath. “Alright, let’s go.”

It was a calm Sunday morning at Aoba Johsai; there were a few customers in line, but the atmosphere was relaxed, nothing like the last time they had been there. It was like the robbery had never happened.

 _These people,_ Semi thought, _have no fucking clue._

He called over one of the employees not currently serving a customer and flashed his badge. “We have a meeting with Oikawa-san.”

“Sure, one second.”

They didn’t need to wait. Oikawa appeared as if from nowhere, giving them his best customer-service smile. “Good morning, detectives. It’s nice to see you again. Got any leads?”

“We might,” Semi said. “We were hoping to talk to you and Iwaizumi-san both. Can we use your office?”

“Of course. Iwaizumi’s in the vault. I’ll get him.” He disappeared into the back.

Ushijima raised his cuff to his mouth. “Seal the rear exit.”

Oikawa and Iwaizumi appeared and led the way to Oikawa’s office. Semi and Tendou took the chairs in front of the desk, Ushijima shutting the door and leaning against it.

Oikawa sat down, Iwaizumi standing behind him. “I heard about your injury, Tendou-san,” Oikawa said. “It’s a shame.”

“Thanks,” Tendou said. “It hurts like a bitch!”

“I hope you find whoever did it soon.”

“We think we already have,” Semi said.

“Oh, really? Who?”

Tendou pointed his good arm at Iwaizumi. “Him.”

Semi observed them both closely, knowing Tendou was doing the same. Oikawa was good; he schooled his face into outrage immediately. Iwaizumi was slower. Semi could read the guilt on his face like a book.

“How— how dare you?” Oikawa sputtered. “How dare you accuse him of something like that?”

“Because it’s true,” Semi said simply. “Isn’t it, Iwaizumi-san?”

“Yeah, it’s true,” Iwaizumi said, his shoulders slumping.

“Iwa-chan!” Oikawa shrieked. “Don’t say another word—”

Iwaizumi rolled his eyes. “Come on, Oikawa, it’s over.” To Tendou, he added, “Sorry for shooting you.”

“I think it’s a little late for that,” Tendou sneered.

“Iwa-chan, be quiet!” Oikawa said. “I demand to know what evidence you’re accusing us on.”

“Technically, I didn’t accuse _you_ of anything yet,” Semi said, “but good to know you feel guilty. Anyway: you fit the physical descriptions from every robbery. You have inside knowledge of security systems, and you knew exactly how much money to ask for so the safe wouldn’t need to be opened. You weren’t working the day of the robbery here, and when we checked, neither of you were working on the days of the others, either. Iwaizumi was here when Aoba Johsai was robbed, but he conveniently took his lunch break twenty minutes earlier than usual and reappeared after the robbery was over.

“But all of that’s circumstantial. It was Iwaizumi who gave you away.” Semi turned to him. “You were clearly a reluctant participant in this from the beginning, yet you shot Tendou without hesitation when he pointed a gun at Oikawa. There’s only one reason you’d do that: because you care about him. Enough to do whatever he says, and enough to do anything to protect him.”

Semi leaned back in his chair, folding his arms. He felt pretty badass; Tendou, too, looked like he wanted to applaud. “Am I wrong?” he asked Iwaizumi.

He shook his head. “No, you’re not. I’d do anything for him.”

 _“Iwa-chan,”_ Oikawa crooned. There were tears in his eyes. 

“Not now, you moron.”

He pouted. “Fine, it was us,” he said to Semi. “But Iwa-chan had nothing to do with it. Put all the blame on me.”

“Sweet as that is,” Tendou said, “he literally shot me, so—” He wiggled a pair of handcuffs at them.

“We are hoping you will come quietly,” Ushijima said.

They did, though Oikawa took some urging from Iwaizumi. They let Semi cuff them both and lead them out of the office.

“Off the record,” Semi asked Oikawa quietly, so Ushijima and Tendou wouldn’t hear. “Why did you do it?”

Oikawa scoffed. “Because I could. Because I wanted to prove how much smarter than everyone I was. I wanted them to know my name.” He smiled bitterly. “I guess now they will.”

Monday morning. Judgement day. Semi wore his nicest suit. Tendou wore pink jeans and a tshirt that said “BANANAS” on it in English. “Might as well go out with a bang, right?”

“You’re not going anywhere,” Semi told him.

They sat at their shared desk, ignoring everyone’s stares. They hadn’t been in the office since Friday, having taken Oikawa and Iwaizumi straight to central booking. Their quiet corner felt like a zoo enclosure. Shirabu sat on his chair like a throne, smirking at everything that moved; Kawanishi wouldn’t meet Semi’s eye.

Only Officer Goshiki was brave enough to speak to them, but just to relay that Ushijima wanted to see them in his office.

“Together?” Semi asked.

“That’s what he said.”

They walked to the gallows side by side. Semi thought he should say something, but there’s nothing left to say. Neither of them could change Ushijima’s mind.

“Good morning,” he greeted them. “Please, sit.”

They sat.

“I will not mince words. Headquarters was not impressed with Friday’s operation. They had it in mind to fire both of you, for putting yourselves and a dozen civilians in danger.”

“But I said Semi had nothing to do with—”

Ushijima silenced him with a hand. “Tendou, let me finish. They were not impressed, but now, the case has been solved. Akaashi Keiji had assured me he will win at trial and the money will be fully recovered. In light of this, I spoke to Superintendent Washijo again this morning. I think you both know he is… results-driven.

“Semi, Washijo-san and I were both impressed with your work on this case. As Tendou has taken responsibility for the… incident, you will not be punished. Sergeant Reon tells me homicide is a bit overworked these days. You would be welcomed back, I believe.”

Semi couldn’t believe what he was hearing. A chance at his old job, his old _life._ A chance to slap the smirk off Shirabu’s face.

“Tendou,” Ushijima continued, “needless to say, you will not get off so easily. You took responsibility for what happened and you will pay for it. There will be no more consulting across precincts; Washijo-san wants you in one place, where he can keep an eye on you.” Ushijima paused. “Because of our history, I requested you be assigned here. I hope that is suitable. I will assign you only low-profile cases — shoplifting, breaking-and-entering — until this is behind us.”

“Yes.” Tendou had to stop and clear his throat. “Yes, thank you, Waka— Ushijima-san.”

“Waka is fine,” Ushijima said. “However, with Semi moving back to homicide, I don’t have a partner for you right now. You’ll work alone, for the foreseeable future.”

“That’s totally fine! Really, it’s—”

“What if I didn’t move back to homicide?” Semi said.

Ushijima frowned. “Excuse me?”

“What if I wanted to be Tendou’s partner? Would you let us keep working together?”

“I don’t think you understand,” Ushijima said slowly. “Tendou won’t be working any important cases for a long time. You have the option to get your career back. To prove yourself.”

“Maybe I don’t want to prove myself. At least, not like this.” He thought about what Oikawa said, about wanting people to know his name. To know he was the best. Semi had been like that once. Tendou had shown him another way.

“I want to stay with Tendou,” he said. “Please, Ushijima-san.”

“Semi-Semi,” Tendou said. “You don’t have to. You don’t owe me anything.”

“I owe you lots, but that’s not why I’m doing this.” He was doing what he thought was right.

“Are you sure this is what you want?” Ushijima asked.

“Positive.” If he wasn’t already convinced, the smile on Tendou’s face would have done it.

“Alright, then,” Ushijima said. “I won’t argue. But I will be watching you two closely.”

“Then prepare for some entertainment, Waka.” Tendou’s bleak mood had disappeared. “We’ll make sure to keep things interesting!”

“See that you don’t,” Ushijima said. “You may go. I am… happy you will both be sticking around.”

Semi rushed from the room; if Ushijima said one more nice thing to him, he was going to cry. Tendou followed, right on his heels.

He pulled Semi into an interrogation room, the same one they’d used for Terushima’s interview. When the door closed behind them, Tendou jumped on Semi, hugging him with his good arm.

“Holy shit!” he yelled. “Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit!”

“Don’t hurt yourself,” Semi muttered, but he couldn’t help but grin. “You’re useless to me as a partner if your arm doesn’t heal.”

“Pssht. I could have no arms and I’d still be a great partner.” He pointed to his temple. “It’s all up here, baby.”

“I can’t believe I agreed to work with you.”

“Me neither,” Tendou said frankly. “But I’m glad you did! Seriously, Semi-Semi, I am so happy, I could kiss you right now.”

“Okay,” Semi said.

“What?”

“Uh—”

The door opened. Shirabu stood behind it, frowning. “What are you two screaming about?”

“Just celebrating,” Tendou said.

“Guess you’re not fired, then.”

“Nope,” Semi said. “Actually, Ushijima offered me my place back on homicide. Better clean out your desk.”

Shirabu gawked. “Seriously?”

“No, but you should see your face. He did offer me homicide, though. I’m just not taking it. Yet.”

Shirabu’s expression returned to its usual sneer. “So what, you’re gonna hand out jaywalking tickets and help kittens out of trees?”

“Oh, I hope so!” Tendou said. “We could get Shiro a friend!”

Shirabu turned to leave. “You two deserve each other.”

“Thank you!” Tendou called after him.

The two of them were alone again. “I guess we should get to work, huh?” Semi said.

“We gonna talk about what you just said?”

“Nope.”

“Not even if I buy you dinner?”

“I’m not going to a restaurant with you dressed like that,” Semi snapped.

“Geh! Fine, I’ll turn the shirt inside out, but I’m not changing the pants. You can’t change me that much, Semi-Semi!”

Semi smiled. He teased, but when it came down to it, he wouldn’t change a thing about Tendou. “Deal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to everyone who's commented already! You can find me at kyrstin.tumblr.com for more HQ nonsense.


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